Aches.

Nobody said it was easy.. No one ever said it would be this hard..

She sitting up in bed, looking listlessly out the window. The snow began to fall straight and steadily from a sky without wind, laying itself in thickets over the ground.  She drowns herself inside the melodies, dancing with her thoughts, with languages she barely understands.

"You've locked yourself  for hours, dear. Come on.." 

She moves her body aside, humming a bit to quickly answer that soft voice behind her. That's her bestfriendㅡ Jane.

"You know, Ann. You deserve better."

"You won't understand, Jane"

"He never cared, when will you realized that?"

"He said he will never leave...", she said with a quivering sigh.

"He was a jerk and everybody knew." Jane holds back some grudges over her stubborn friend.

She looked away, curving her lips into a pleading smile.

"Listen, Jane. He has something special that no one else can touch. It's so naive but I keep telling myself that we were meant to be. I living my fantasy and it's more than enough. He was like an angel who fix everything but when he left, everything starts to fall apart. You refused to replaced him with someone else, because no one has the same soul like him, not in million years".

It was a day she won't ever forget. The day that she first felt heartbreak. The day when Keegan Walt, the man that has always been her everything, literally her everything, left her for unknown reason. But well, in the other day, the universe knew he got back with his ex, the hottest captain of cheerleader in town.

Long story short, this mere words, is all about how she never stopped gardening on a dead ground, just in case, it will blossom like how it used to be..

Annie Quinn

I wonder why it's called falling in love, when falling means breaking.
I wonder how people taking love as a game, make the victim fall into the stupid trap, and leave.
And now here I am, trying to dig my way out of the site, wondering where I exactly crashed and still counting how many pieces of myself had gone missing.

"When I say I miss you,

I mean that I miss looking into your beautiful deep brown eyes, sharp gaze of you that always make me paralyzed.

I mean that my ears miss your voice, and the way you say how much I mean to you.

I mean that my hands miss your hands, how your hand fits into mine like it was made for each other."

My fingers couldn't stop writting, pouring all the pain into some dancing poems.


"Annie!", I heard someone rushing over me as he called my name.

"Oh, hi, Brian", I shoot a smile towards him.

"Free, tonight?, he asked.

"Uhm, kinda. Why?", I raise my eyebrow confused.

"I'll pick you up at 7, okay?", he sounds demanding.

I darted my eyes to my left where Jane was, and she was staring wide-eyed at the person in front of me.

"Oh oh there, Brian  Hasley, still not giving up on her huh?, Jane teased him.

I rolled my eyes, half whispered "Jane, stop".

"It's a cycle isn't? You love who ignores you, and ignores who love you. But I gotta win her heart though", he laughs cheekily. "See you soon, Princess"

My voice caught in my throat. Ugh, that Brian guy keep bothering me, but I can't avoid him re angelic, okay", she is always excited when it's about Brian.

I raise my shoulders and walk by, not paying attention to her.

Well, other than my feeling for Keegan, I just.. I'm afraid at the idea of falling in love again.

"Why don't you simply give up on him and move on? As if.. to me, maybe?", Brian innocently asked.

"Because..", I smile and uttered a sigh "Moving on is not easy as it said, when you love someone that much, that deep. You sit in agonizing hope praying that maybe, just maybe, they'll take you back all over again"

"But you hurt yourself, dear", he fixed his gaze to me.

"All I know is the pain he caused, is nothing compared to the pain of losing him, the pain of not having him in my life." I take a deep breathe before I continue, "And the only thing I regret is not being kinder while we still  had time. I wish I had told him he was worth the universe. I wish I had told him that I love hs wasim every second we went. Cause we never think that the last time is the last time. We think there will be more. You think you have forever, you think all the promises supposed to be real, but you dont."

And suddenly, all the memories about him flash in my eyes. Once again, my whole world breaks.

Brian Hasley

Tears start to stream down her pale face. I hugged her, protecting her from the pain. My heart was extremely sank. Dang, I'm so stupid.

"I'm sorry, Ann. I shouldn't dragged out this topic", I tighten my arm around her.

She simply shook her head, "You cant just shut off your feelings, Brian," she almost whispers, her voice breaking. "I wish I could.. but I can't. I just don't understand how you could love someone and leave the other day."

"You have me, Ann. I'm here.." I caress her head softly. It's ironic to see the one you love crying over an unworthy jerk, isn't?

"If you know how to control your feelings, please tell me." she looks up at me, pleading with teary eyes.

Since then, all I knew is I have to keep her by my side, Annie Quinn. 


Some months later..

Keegan Walt

I feel empty as the time goes by. Never thought the sight of her would haunt me every night. Never knew I would miss her presence in my life.
I said goodbye and moved on, But my heart thought this was merely vacation and after a while I could feel it aching for home.

"You're important to me. I think if there's anythin that will last forever, it's that. Whether we seperate, stay in touch or rarely speak again, you will always be that littlesomeeone I really do care for, that I would sacrifice everything for protect and keep safe."

"And your complete and utter happiness is all I want, you being happy is all I need, I aspire to make you the happiest you could be. You not being happy is what could break me because you being happy is what makes me happy. Your happiness is mine as well."

That was the last quote from Annie's favorite book, she chose for me. But now it doesn't seem like the way it used to be. Because right now, all the love quotes, the poem she writes, is no longer about me.

END

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it was the combination of some pathetic quotes i have on my galery, weird plots inside my brain, and my holy gloominess this past week. so it turned out unsynchronized and pardon for any mistyped and grammatical error. thanks for reading anywaaaaaaaaaayyyy